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Thursday, March 26, 2009

Let the screaming continue

Oh boy...Gabe is still at it. He had speech today. He had some nasty behavior but his ST did a great job redirecting. Well I guess he had too much redirecting with her that he couldn't be redirected with me. He always gets a prize after speech. Just ONE prize. Mr. Gabe thought he had to have TWO. I tried to help him pick one...but there was no way he was giving up. He ended up with NO prize. I had to physically carry him out of the office leaving Zane in his car seat sitting with other clients.

Absolutely devastated this time...one of the gals I work with had her son in for his ST and she saw the whole thing. She knows Gabe has an autism dx...but still...it was rather upsetting. I didn't cry this time. Gabe had two more meltdowns at home. I made him take a nap today. So far this evening he has been pretty good.

I decided I am calling for a TSS. I don't care if Matt doesn't want Gabe to have one. I can't deal with a baby and a child that is running from me in the parking lot. There is a huge safety issue there. Not to mention Gabe has started hitting me.

Wish I knew what was going on that is causing all these tantrums. hmmmm...

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

The Shot

Everyone that knows me has had their ears talked off about vaccine's by me! I have been researching vaccine's since Gabe was dx'd with autism. I don't think vaccine's caused his ASD but who knows. What I learned was vaccine's have a whole lot of yuck in them. I decided that I am going to vax Zane very, very, very, slowly. That means one shot every month or two...and no combo shots excepts for DTaP because you can't get it separated. Because of Matt's and my decision to go slow and delete some vaccine's we were kicked out of our old pediatricians office! Doh.

Well today Zane got his first vaccine. He got DTaP. He seems to be okay. A bit fussy but not too bad. He did however act really weird when he woke from a nap. In fact, I thought he was having a seizure. His little arms were flailing around and his eyes looked weird...but it was over too quick and I think it was a really bad startle reflex. He woke up and was on his back and I think it scared him. He doesn't like to lay on his back. Of course it scared the hell out of me and I screamed for Matt...but Zane was okay by the time he came into the bedroom. So, I think it is me just being a crazy momma. I won't take my eyes off of him now!

Why does the big Pharm have to put such nasty things in our children....

I thought about going vax free...but with me working in the medical field I am afraid of bringing things home to my children. Hopefully this shot doesn't do anything to Zane. He is perfect in every way. He coo's and make beautiful eye contact. He is interested in people's faces...and I don't want any of that to fade away....

....already dreading shot number two.....

Monday, March 23, 2009

The weekend Melt Down...

Wow...who ate my child. Gabe has meltdowns here and there. Some are extremely unpleasing. Not that any are a fun ride, but the one on Saturday takes the prize.

I took both kids to the store! My first big mistake. Everything was going great until we hit the cereal aisle. "Gabe,pick a cereal buddy" My second mistake...which proved to be catastrophic in nature. "Cereal sticks mom" says Gabe. "No not this time kiddo. Please pick something else" That was all I needed to say. From then on it was full screaming, crying, yelling "let me go", hitting, kicking, and maybe even some spitting.

I have been embarrassed in the store before, but this time I was devastated. I could feel people staring at me. I dare not make eye contact with anyone...because at any given moment I was going to lose it and start screaming and crying.

I quickly finished shopping and proceeded to the check out. Gabe continued screaming and kicking. Now however he was locked into the cart...I had to pull the cart for fear of being kicked by flying feet. The check out lady said "hows your day" I just looked at her with those "you have to be kidding me eyes...and said could be better"

Gabe managed to scream and cry for over and hour. He ran from me in the parking lot...and continued screaming and crying once we got home. Needless to say I cried pretty much the whole way home too. Daddy tried to help...but Gabe ran from him too! Finally I got Gabe to let me hold him...and I rocked him and rocked him...and his little body relaxed...as did I...until the baby started crying...oh boy!

Gabe had another melt down on Sunday but not near as bad. I hope this is just the weather changing. Gabe is not a perfect child. He has some behavior issues...but usually I can redirect him. There was no redirecting this weekend...And the running from me in the parking lot is just...well...it's just scary.

I hope this week turns out to be better....

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Sick kids and going back to work

Wow....I have to go back to work on Tuesday. Where did time go? I have really enjoyed my time off. Sure wish I could be a stay at home mommy. Oh well working two days a week and every other weekend isn't so bad.

So Gabe is a sick cookie. He keeps running high fevers. Looks like we are going to have to head to the dr tomorrow. Not what I wanted to be doing right before going back to work...but that's what it looks like I am going to have to do.

I took Zane off the zantac. It wasn't helping. He still screams his head off. His new dr. suggested I not drink or eat milk products. Ugh that is hard. I love cereal in the morning. I just started the no milk thing...so hopefully that helps Zane's tummy issues.

We had to change dr.s recently because we got kicked out of our old office for not vaccinating Zane. Our new dr. is AWESOME! They said we can do our vaccine how ever we want. Nice and slow go the vaccine's for little baby Zane.

Other then poor sick Gabe...things are going rather well. I am excited to go back to work...but will miss all my time at home...